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How would you like this story to end?
A very simple and powerful thought exercise: Think of a situation you’re in that feels challenging, or maybe is wrought with feeling or tension, or has somehow captured your emotional and mental energies. Perhaps it’s tough conversation, a tough decision, a lot happening, or feeling into what to do next. As you look at what’s…
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Being nice vs being kind
When we give feedback to another person, be it at work or home, with friends or family, why do we so often default to being nice instead of being kind?
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Take your “self” out of it
When you are thinking about what other people are doing, did, or are about to do, take yourself out of it. For example, you might think “My friends went to the park and didn’t invite me.” Remove that last bit. “My friends went to the park.” That’s all you really know anyway, isn’t it? Likewise,…
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All feedback is not equal
Consider the three different types of feedback you can give and receive: Appreciation: this is when you are noticing and recognizing when someone does something well, does it in a unique way, or even demonstrates something they hadn’t before Evaluation: this is when you are ranking someone’s actions or results compared to others or compared…
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Have you tried explaining that to an alien?
I’ve written before about how to help someone new at work, and getting feedback is one of my favorite topics related to being better at your craft. It just so happens that a very underrated way to practice giving and getting feedback is to be in charge of “onboarding” new people to your team (or…
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Make feedback a habit
The best thing you can do to improve performance in your work (or sport, hobby, etc) is to create opportunities for deliberate practice AND have a strong feedback loop in place that is timely and actionable.
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How to make good decisions
You are constantly making decisions in your life and your work. How do you ensure you are making the best decisions you can? The short answer is that you have to practice it. The longer answer is that decision-making is a skill and it is learned like every other skill. There are hundreds (thousands?) of…
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Time to get a coach
As noted in my amplify and reduce goals for the month, one of my habits that I want to amplify is getting feedback, and to do that this month I’m working on getting a coach.
Writing and drawings by Nick.
